Article 23/04/2018

What your coffee cup says about you

Lauren Rutter By Lauren Rutter

There’s no denying that we are a nation of on-the-go, coffee addicts. Fuelling our daily trips from A-to-B-to-C with liquid gold. If we were guinea pigs, our drip feeder would be placed right beside our running-wheel and filled with long black so we could drink coffee while on-the-move forever. And with 1 billion coffee cups piling into landfill every year in Australia alone, we’ve accepted that the only way to save ourselves from being buried alive in single-use cups, is to commit to a long-term relationship with something more sustainable.

Reusable coffee cups are the ultimate statement piece for 2018, and there’s more brands and styles to choose from than there are types of milk available at your local cafe (I’m looking at you, hemp milk). And everyday that you present your trusty cup to the barista, in front of a queue of people, you are unknowingly letting onlookers in on a number of your little quirks.

 

So which cup reflects the true you?

Frank Green

  • Always takes group photos on their phone because they have the best camera
  • Cries when they see a working guide dog
  • A sucker for dad jokes
  • Takes at least 2 attempts to park the car
  • Wishes everyone would just be nice to each other

 

Keep Cup

  • Speaks about 1000 words per minute
  • Wakes up at 4am to go for a run
  • Regularly functioning on minimal sleep
  • The one in the group that always pays for the Uber
  • 500+ LinkedIn connections

 

Sol Cup

  • Plays their own Insta-story on repeat
  • Uses hands-free even when their hands are free
  • Constantly snacking on some never-ending supply of almonds
  • Late to everything, but would never admit it
  • Macadamia milk lattes are #life

 

Bamboo cup (e.g. Ecoffee cup)

  • Obsessed with growing their hair
  • Calls their pet their “fur baby”
  • Takes abstract Instagram photos of buildings
  • Always calls instead of texting
  • Major appreciation for a good homemade sandwich

 

Joco

  • Asks the waiter 20 questions about the menu
  • Runs into someone they know every time they go out
  • Always buys the first round
  • Tries to talk while they’re yawning
  • Makes an announcement every time they replace the toilet paper or unload the dishwasher

 

Thermos

  • Tomato sauce on everything. EVERYTHING
  • Well-defined tan lines
  • Everything they do is “for a laugh”
  • Member of at least 10 group chats
  • So laid-back they might fall asleep at any moment

 

And if you’re still using those dreaded single-use coffee cups, or you’ve forgotten why you even made the switch to reusable, then you’d better pop the kettle on and have a read of this.

 

Lauren Rutter By Lauren Rutter